Happy Hands, Roooar!

We moved. We lost a teapot. I was totally sick, and barfed a few times (ewwww). Hubby and I are sort of not understanding each other. My mother moved far, far away ::cheers erupt from Smalltown Alberta...::. I still have boxes to deal with that are cluttering up the house.
I woke up this morning not knowing where I was.

Does that about cover everything? :grin:

This morning it snowed when I walked my kids to school. Freak, it was cold!!!! It was so pretty though, too. All these lovely white flakes, silently drifting down from above - almost as a Godly benediction of peace onto my head.
And then my preschooler broke the lovely mood by snickering "Mum, you have white stuff all over your head. I want to hit it!"
And my youngest was making his mittens say "Happy hands, roooar, rooar, roooar..." over and over again.

*sigh* I have a sneaking suspicion that I don't make enough money for what I do some days.

We have a bit of a fancy-schmancy shin dig to go to in the next few days, and I have this horrified fear that I might need a new dress to wear. SHIT! I hate dressing up! Give me jeans and a tee any day..... (Don't get me started on the heels.... Or the hose. ARGH!)

Other than that, we are settling into life in Smalltown rather well. I've discovered the local Wal-Mart, the Rafters shop, and The Dollar Store. I was just trying to unpack boxes. SO far I've unpacked all the DVD's, cd's (and alphabetized them, to boot), most of the books, the kitchen, most of the kids rooms, most of the master room, my clothes, and a good amount of Hubby's clothes. (Don't get me started..... Don't even get me started....)

I'm just wanting Hubby to get a car of his own now. I'm tired of being stuck at home with no way to get any where other than my own 2 feet with 2 cranky kids.

I think I just need to face the truth - I think I have PMS. Hand over the salty snacks and chocolate, and nobody gets hurt.....

Well, I finally kind of "had it out" with my mother tonight about the way she has been treating me (which I feel is badly). I told her that I felt forgotten, disregarded, traded in and unimportant due to her behavior as of late. I also told her that I felt that she was inconsistent and unreliable with my children, so that was why I had really cut down her access to them as of late.
I'm not too sure what to feel about the encounter... I don't know if there will be lasting change, or more intentional speaking now, but at least I told her how I felt.
I hated doing it, though. I really hated doing it.

So far today, I cried twice. I hate days like that.....

Hubby and I had an argument of sorts this morning over the phone. He felt I was shutting him out, and I was distancing myself emotionally from him. So, I had to tell him how I felt (overwhelmed, incompetent, dumb..... ad nauseum), and ended up bawling thru that. I hate feelings. I hate sharing feelings. I hate everything to do with feelings!!!! (I'd rather have a root canal with no freezing!)
Hubby asked jokingly if I was sure I was a girl, as that was a very guy thing for me to say (and mean).

We move in 4 days. I'm a little overwhelmed - just feeling (there's that word I hate again....) very over my head.

I'm honestly not sure of how to feel - I feel sort of numb and distant from myself.
I am, however, ready for this stage of my life to be done.